You know those things you just can’t handle? They just make you boil with fury just thinking about it? Yeah, this post is for that. Believe it or not, I had to narrow down my list to only 17 because I had like 50. I’ll probably make a part 2 of this or a post about pet peeves or something. We’ll see.
But anyways, here are “17 Things I Can’t Even” (not including the phrase, “I can’t even”)
- Winged eyeliner– Okay, so this one is kind of basic. But I hate when you’re putting on winged eyeliner and one eye comes out flawless and the other eye looks like you just drew on it with sharpie. THEN you go back to fix that eye and you get it to look somewhat okay, but it doesn’t match the other eye. Then you make the mistake of going to fix the flawless eye and completely ruin that eye. Then you decide “hm, I guess I should just start over” and end up having to take off all your makeup, including eyeshadow, concealer, and everything. I can’t even.
- Teachers who don’t get up from their desk– OMG I CAN’T! Your job is to teach, so TEACH! Don’t sit at your desk and read the notes I’m copying! I can read them myself, damnit. Get up and teach. Explain. Give us activities to do to help us understand. My education is in your hands, please don’t mess it up.
- When guys say they like girls who don’t wear any makeup– this makes me mad for a number of reasons. For one thing, girls don’t wear makeup to impress guys. I genuinely enjoy wearing makeup. Sure, winged eyeliner is annoying, but I love experimenting with different eyeshadows and lip colors. I don’t wear it to impress boys, I wear it because I like it. And second, guys say they prefer girls with the “natural, no makeup” look, but do they even know what that is? What they think is natural, is actually a ton of makeup. You think Kim Kardashian’s look is natural? HA! Boys, you don’t know what you like.
- When your cashier doesn’t take the censor off your clothes– YOU HAD ONE JOB! This is again annoying for two reasons. Either they don’t take the sensor off and you leave the store and send off all the alarms causing a scene, or you don’t set off the alarms and go home and realize you can’t wear the cute top you just bought because a censor is on it. In which case, what even is the point of the censor if it doesn’t work? PLEASE TAKE OFF THE CENSORS! Ugh, I can’t.
- Being told “You’re short”– Okay, I’m very petite. I’m aware I’m petite. I don’t need you pointing out the obvious, telling me I’m short. I know.
- Being mistaken for a 12 year old– to go along with this, I hate when people think I’m younger than I am. I’m 17, not 12. Last week, I was at the eye doctors with my mom and the lady at the front desk said to me “Do you think you can handle your own clipboard?” Um, yes. I can very much handle my own clipboard. Not to mention, everytime I go ice skating with my friends, I get hit on by a bunch of boys in middle school. Never by ones my own age. It really is the struggle.
- Girls who call their boyfriends “daddy”– Ew. Ew. Ew. How is that hot? You are referring to your boyfriend as your father? That’s weird, and creepy. Honestly, I’m not a fan of pet names is general. “Babe” is about as far as I will go. Even referring to someone as “baby” is kind of gross to me. My favorite pet name? Cinnamon apple. Hahaha, like this post if you get it!
- When you show someone a video you think is hilarious, but they don’t laugh– Just like I would do with the cinnamon apple video, but it’s a bit too vulgar so I won’t. But you know when you find a video or even a movie that you find absolutely hysterical and you make your friend watch it and they don’t even crack a smile? And you just sit there like
- Girls whose lives revolve around their boyfriend– I literally can’t. You blow off all your friends all for this one guy who you think you’re in love with and you’re going to get married to when you hardly even know him. Word of advice: don’t put all your attention on a relationship because most likely, it won’t last forever. Instead, focus on building friendships that could last a lifetime. Also, going along with this is people who are never single. Why do you feel like you always need to be in a relationship? You shouldn’t have to depend on others to make you happy. If you can’t make yourself happy, how do you expect others to?
- People who write “best friends forever” or “we better hang out this summer” in your yearbook when you aren’t even friends– SO annoying. People will write about how much they love you and how you’re going to be “best friends for life” in your yearbook and then you end up never speaking to them again. Way to waste signing space in my yearbook.
- Guys who don’t know how to properly wear jeans- Please do not wear mom jeans, saggy jeans, or jeans that are too short. I’ll admit, I’m quite picky when it comes to guys in jeans. I just feel like they never wear them right. Jeans should be tight, not necessarily skinny jeans, but they should be fitting. I don’t like baggy jeans.
- When people say “no offense” after saying something offensive– “You look like a twelve year old… no offense.” Okay? I’m still offended? Saying “no offense” after saying something offensive doesn’t make it any less offensive.. like
- Teachers who think their class is the only class students take– I am in school for 7 hours and I have 7 classes. I get homework in every class. I don’t need to come home and read 30 pages, plus answer questions 1-20, and study for Friday’s test all for your single class! Please teachers, keep in mind we have other classes and a lot of other homework. High school students get stressed too. Please don’t overwork us.
- People who hand out apples on Halloween– I’m all for eating healthy, but it’s Halloween damnit. Either hand out candy or don’t hand out anything at all. No one wants an apple that’s been passed around. That’s actually kind of gross. Just buy a bag full of Kit Kats. In fact, it’s a lot cheaper than buying a bunch of apples. I don’t know, I just don’t get it.
- Being told to “calm down” when I was never worked up to begin with– By telling me to “calm down” or “relax” you are going to get the exact opposite out of me. I get so angry whenever I’m told to chill that I’ll end up getting wayyyyy more worked up then I was in the first place.
- Clothes that shrink in the dryer– I just spent $30 on a new dress, wore it once, and now I can’t wear it again because it’s too short now. Like WHY?! Why do things like this happen???? I just want to dress nice!
- TV shows that end on a cliff hanger but don’t get picked up for a new season– This has to be the most frustrating. I’m one of those people who get so emotionally involved in a television show, that when it doesn’t get picked back up I actually lose my mind. I don’t care if it’s fiction, I NEED to know what’s going to happen! Currently, I’m obsessed with the show Under the Dome. It just ended its second season and the finale was absolutely insane. Under the Dome’s views dropped quite a lot during the second season so now there are rumors that it won’t return and I’m honestly quite horrified. This show has to return… I’m addicted. I know it’s a Stephen King book, but the book and show are apparently nothing alike. To anyone who watches the show, do you have any idea if it’s returning? It’s mighty important that it does.
But anyways, that’s it. Those are “17 Things I Can’t Even.” Stay tuned for a part 2, coming soon.